Christmas is a terrible time of the year to be unemployed. There’ll be no office Christmas parties to go to and no appalling Secret Santa gifts to open from your tight-fisted colleagues. You’ll therefore need to fill your festive season with an alternative pursuit to working in an office for a living.
Christmas is a time when consumers are likely to spend their hard earned wages on lots of stuff they really don’t need, so why not capitalise on the momentary madness and record your own Christmas single?
You never know, you might just get to the Christmas number 1 spot!
Write a Song
This is not as easy as it sounds. The best way to go about doing this is by listening to the music you love and trying to emulate it. Despite the popular perception, it’s the way even the most, ‘original,’ music gets created. In trying to become the next Rhianna, your inevitable failure at doing so might just result in you hitting on your own unique sound. The main thing to get right at this stage is the structure for a basic pop song which is: Verse, Pre-chorus, Chorus, Verse, Chorus, Middle Eight, Chorus.
Create a Melody
You’ll need to construct your melody and make it memorable by being clever with how you use variation and repetition. Do you want a melody that’s sad or one that’s upbeat and happy? There are no rules but your chorus should be of such a type that it can be belted out aloud on a karaoke machine if you want the Christmas number 1 spot.
Put Some Music Around the Tune
You may need to get help from a musical friend if you don’t play an instrument yourself. Alternatively, if your Christmas number one is more rhythmically driven you may want to hook up with a producer or, ‘beat maker,’ that has pre-recorded backing tracks for you to warble over. Remember at this stage to draw up an agreement with any collaborators about how you’ll split the profits. This will avoid any kiss and tell scandals when your song is at number 1 and you run off with all the royalties.
Make a Rough Demo and Share it with People
You’ll need to get as much feedback on your song as possible before you go into the studio so the best thing to do at this stage is get on Facebook and start sharing it with people. You’ll need to develop a thick skin pretty quickly as people will inevitably laugh at you when you tell them you’re going for the Christmas number 1.
Record the Song Properly
Now we’re at the business end of things!
You’ll need to find a recording studio that’s local to you and ideally you should be in and out as quickly as possible to keep your costs to a minimum. A studio can cost anything from £50 – £1000 per hour so we advise you have the lyrics to your worldwide Christmas smash hit memorised before the session otherwise you’ll never recoup your recording costs.
Mix the Final Track
This is the point in the process where your Christmas song should start to sound like a proper record. A good mix engineer will get the song sounding clear and balanced whilst also giving it the atmosphere necessary to beat the X Factor winner to the top of the charts.
Mastering the Track
This is the home straight in terms of the recording process. Mastering should add a final gloss to your finished song and should take its overall sound quality up a notch. You should now feel ready for the world to hear you.
Get it Out There
There are a multitude of ways to get your music heard these days but you certainly need to be interacting with people on social media. You could submit your Christmas smasher to Spotify so that people can stream it and sites like itunes and Amazon are also important. You will need to be chart registered to get your sales officially logged and a good press release will be essential to keep the newspapers interested in your meteoric rise (if you can engineer a fake story about the time you once saved a puppy from drowning as the inspiration for your hit, that might help to win a few extra hearts as far as the public are concerned). After that, sit back and watch the magic happen.
NB – If you can’t be bothered to do all of the above you could always enter the X Factor and try to win the competition, although if you do you must be aware that your music career will be over in next to no time.