You’ve just been sacked………why not time travel into the future?

You’ve just been sacked………why not time travel into the future?

The boredom, the constant twiddling of thumbs, binge-watching The Bill from the very first episode of series one – unemployment isn’t quite what you’d hoped it would be when you were first given your marching orders is it? Despite wondering why the hell you were ever a fan of The Bill when you watched the…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not create the most valuable company ever?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not create the most valuable company ever?

We’ve finally found out what UNEMPLOYED stands for! All along we thought it was just some word that referred to someone that is without a paid job but available to work, but in reality it means: Ultra Naughty Employee Made Penny Less Over Young Eyecandy Dalliance. Now that we have this cleared up, we need…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not set up your own record label?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not set up your own record label?

Here’s how to say ‘unemployment’ in some of the most random languages we can think of: Gortsazrkut’yun = Armenian Bēkāri = Bangla Nezaměstnanost = Czech Werkloosheid = Dutch Senlaboreco = Esperanto Bērōjagārī = Nepali Kubasa = Shona Arbetslöshet = Swedish Ho hloka mosebetsi = Sesotho Diweithdra = Welsh Ukungasebenzi = Zulu Now that we’ve got…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not become an animal psychologist?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not become an animal psychologist?

So, your bedtime is now usually the same time that most people wake up and the time you wake up is roughly the same time that most people go to bed. Unemployment has forced these new nocturnal habits upon you and despite not really being bothered about not having a job to get up for…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not become an ethical hacker?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not become an ethical hacker?

Some unemployment facts: In the three months to February 2017 there were 33.4 million people in the UK labour force and 1.56 million people were classed as unemployed, which maybe explains why The Jeremy Kyle Show has such a ready supply of people willing to air their dirty linen live on air most mornings of…

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10 things to do in an interview that will ensure you don’t end up getting the job

10 things to do in an interview that will ensure you don’t end up getting the job

You’ve been made redundant, you’re now unemployed, you’re signing on at the job centre, the sun is shining and the pubs are open……… Let’s face it, things could be a lot, lot, worse. At some point you’re going to have to get another job but for the meantime (summer), there’s no point in rushing the…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not become the next Dynamo?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not become the next Dynamo?

Here are the main reasons why being unemployed can be a whole load of fun: You don’t have to get up early in the morning to go to work. You get loads of free stuff from the government like dental treatment and bus passes. You can binge watch The Jeremy Kyle Show. You can spend…

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5 things you’ll miss about being unemployed when you finally get a new job

5 things you’ll miss about being unemployed when you finally get a new job

Unemployment is a trying time for the best of people – even those that have never actually had a proper job like The Queen. It causes you to doubt yourself and question your role in the world on an existential level. Who am I? What is my purpose? Should I really have bought a bottle…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not become a professional tennis champion?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not become a professional tennis champion?

There are various things you can do when you first lose your job. You can either: Cry. Buy a bottle whisky and then cry after consuming half of it in the time it takes to drink a double measure. Cry, then buy a bottle of whisky and consume the lot in 5 gulps before crying…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not become a circus performer?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not become a circus performer?

  They say that everything happens for a reason but your reason for being unemployed is simply that you haven’t yet managed to find another job. Whether it’s because there have been stronger candidates than you competing for the same roles or it may indeed mean that your old boss wasn’t joking when he uttered…

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