Marks and Spencer will peg the price of Percy Pigs to the value of Bitcoin

Marks and Spencer will peg the price of Percy Pigs to the value of Bitcoin

  Marks and Spencer has announced it will peg the price of Percy Pig sweets to the value of bitcoin in a bid to thwart the negative effects of Brexit on supplies.   A 170g bag of the famous sweets now costs £1.65, up from £1.50 and the retailer says that much like the adoption…

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Carlsberg Special Brew to be reclassified as Scotch Whisky after Brexit

Carlsberg Special Brew to be reclassified as Scotch Whisky after Brexit

  The UK’s trade deal with the US after Brexit may see drinks like Carlsberg Special Brew being reclassified as Scotch Whisky.   The current EU definition of whisky protects the Scottish whisky industry from sub-standard products, but that is all likely to change after the UK’s European divorce when drinks like 20/20, Thunderbirds, Kestrel…

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BMW pledges to build at least one of its electric Mini models in the UK after Brexit

BMW pledges to build at least one of its electric Mini models in the UK after Brexit

  BMW has committed to building a fully electric version of the Mini in the UK regardless of the outcome of Brexit trade negotiations.   The company says that it has “neither sought nor received” any reassurances from the UK Government on post-Brexit trading arrangements, so as a result will focus its efforts on constructing…

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Pound is now lower than Lance Armstrong’s Tour de France race strategy

Pound is now lower than Lance Armstrong’s Tour de France race strategy

  The pound has lost so much value since last year’s Brexit vote that it is now rumoured to be lower than Lance Armstrong’s Tour de France race strategy.   British holidaymakers faced one of the worst exchange rates on record this weekend, with the pound falling so fast that simply saying the word ‘pound’…

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Ryanair cancelling UK-EU flights will make absolutely no difference to journey times

Ryanair cancelling UK-EU flights will make absolutely no difference to journey times

  Ryanair boss Michael O’Leary told the European parliament that the cancellation of flights between the UK and EU will make absolutely no difference to journey times.   Despite Heathrow being deserted, summer holidays cancelled and aircraft being moved to Europe as a result of Brexit, Ryanair flights have historically landed so far away from…

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The Full English breakfast to be sold on hire purchase after Brexit

The Full English breakfast to be sold on hire purchase after Brexit

  The price of a Full English Breakfast may increase so sharply if the UK government doesn’t agree a trade deal with the EU, that shoppers may be forced to purchase their fry ups on hire purchase.   Despite being about as English as Nigel Farage’s ancestral line, the inaccurately named Full English Breakfast is…

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EU negotiators to wear Geisha girl outfits in the next round of Brexit talks

EU negotiators to wear Geisha girl outfits in the next round of Brexit talks

  European Union negotiators are expected to attend the next round of Brexit talks wearing Geisha girl outfits after signing a trade deal with Japan.   The dressing up of senior EU officials in kimonos and Nihongami wigs is said to be a key clause in the political agreement that seeks to engender greater cross-cultural…

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EU wants Wenlock and Mandeville to lead UK Brexit negotiation team

EU wants Wenlock and Mandeville to lead UK Brexit negotiation team

  European leaders have called on Wenlock and Mandeville to head up the UK’s Brexit negotiation team.   The EU is dismayed at the uncertainty the UK general election has created and sees the London 2012 Olympic mascots as the only credible leadership left in Britain that has anything approaching a mandate from voters. The…

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EU prays for less UK stag and hen parties after Brexit

EU prays for less UK stag and hen parties after Brexit

  In the wake of the UK’s decision to leave the EU, many European countries have been hoping for fewer British stag and hen parties visiting them as the pound continues to decrease in value.   In the first quarter of 2017 however, the numbers travelling abroad from the UK rose 3 per cent from…

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