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Darcus White - The W1nners' Club

He knows fuck all about management


Dear Darcus,

I think my ex-employer has hacked into my Google Chrome account. When I left my previous job, I couldn’t get a job in the industry I had been working in for the last 10 years so I decided to change career and go into business on my own. I set up my own website but unfortunately every time I try to upload new content my Google Chrome browser doesn’t seem to work. I’m pretty sure my ex-employer is responsible for hacking my computer because they told me when i left the company that i’d never be able to leave and in any case they would always sabotage my computer in the office when I worked for them which, if you think about, it is pretty stupid because they were paying me?? Do you think I should seek legal action and sue the living sh*t out of these half-wit morons I wisely erased from my life – or so I thought?


Dear Reader,

Here at The W1nners’ Club we’ve had a couple of staff members who have left the company that we too have treated rather badly in the past. The trouble with being deluded enough to think that you own the entire galaxy is that you often don’t believe anybody would want to leave your company because you believe it’s the greatest place on earth to work. When staff do turn around and give you the middle finger because they’ve decided that they’re better off working anywhere other than with you on pain of death, it’s extremely hurtful to your ego so you feel the need to exact some revenge. We have often used various tactics to teach deserters a lesson like hiring private detectives to hack into their computers, spreading vicious rumours about their current state of mental health to prospective employers, calling them names in the street and paying people to break into their property to move their belongings about. So far we haven’t been taken to court because of such behaviour but I fear our run of good luck may soon be coming to an end – mainly because the person in question was you and we’ve just given you all the evidence you need to bring a successful case against us.

Hope this helps!

Please send your business world worries in to Whilst we can’t guarantee a successful conclusion, we can gurantee a major escalation of the crisis as a result of our involvement.


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