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Darcus White - The W1nners' Club

He knows fuck all about management


Dear Darcus,
I absolutely adore Country music and on a Friday afternoon I will often put on my stetson hat and sing along to country FM which I deliberately play as loud as possible so everyone else in the office can join in with me. The trouble is everyone else on the team says they hate country music. Do you think I should listen to their complaints or tell people that i’m the boss and to look for a job elsewhere if Dwight Yoakam isn’t your thing?


Dear Reader,

The first thing I’d like to say is what the hell do you think you’re doing employing people that don’t like country music? Everybody knows that people who listen to Hip Hop are car thieves and people that like Heavy Metal might turn up to work wearing trench coats and wielding firearms. Country music fans, despite being a tad racist – are generally stand up folk who can be relied upon to get the job done on any given day and my only regret is that we don’t have more of them working here with us at The W1nners’ Club. My suggestion is that when you conduct interviews for new staff going forward, you should ask them to play you a Hank Williams song on an acoustic guitar word perfect before even considering taking them on. That way you’ll know if they’re the sort of person you want around the office on a Friday when you don the old stetson.

Hope this helps.


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