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Darcus White - The W1nners' Club

He knows fuck all about management


Dear Darcus,
My colleagues are jealous of me because my dad owns the company, I went travelling for a year and when I came back I was given a seat on the board. Should I make their lives a living hell in revenge?


Dear Reader,

It’s not what you know in life that counts – but who! Everybody knows that but for some reason this fact seems to have escaped your coworkers or rather, underlings as they should now be referred to as. It’s important to understand that destiny is not decided by you, but is preordained by the heavens, so anybody that has a problem with you sitting on the board even though you don’t have a clue about the business should take up astrology. It is important however, that you use your power wisely so make sure you get rid of people that you didn’t get on with before you went away and hire lots of your mates. That way you’ll have plenty of spies on the ground to report on your enemies of they start to plan a mutiny – the ungrateful sods!

Hope this helps.

Feel free to tell us about your workplace issues via It is after all good to have a shoulder to cry on in times of need. The problem however, is that we probably need your shoulder to cry on more than you need ours!


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