Spoof business news

The latest roundup of what never happened in the world of business...

McDonald’s has a McGold card for people that will never need a McGold card
28th November 2017

McDonald’s has a McGold card for people that will never need a McGold card

  McDonald’s has a McGold card that entitles cardholders to unlimited free meals from its fast food restaurants – but they are only available to people that can prove they will never ...

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UK water companies use witchcraft to decide customer bills
27th November 2017

UK water companies use witchcraft to decide customer bills

  Ten of the 12 water companies in the UK have admitted that they still use the practice of witchcraft as a way to decipher how much to charge customers.   The disclosure has prompted ...

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$500million investment in Lyft not enough to go south of the river say black cabs
24th November 2017

$500million investment in Lyft not enough to go south of the river say black cabs

London black cab drivers have announced that the additional $500million of funding that has just been awarded to the ride hailing app Lyft would not be enough to convince them to make a journey ...

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Warner Bros aims to break CGI facial hair removal budget record with Justice League 2
23rd November 2017

Warner Bros aims to break CGI facial hair removal budget record with Justice League 2

  Warner Brothers have announced their aim to break the current CGI facial hair removal budget record with Justice League 2.   The movie studio is planning to go all out for the next ...

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Chinese tech giant Tencent is now worth more than a dime
22nd November 2017

Chinese tech giant Tencent is now worth more than a dime

  The Chinese social media giant Tencent is now worth considerably more than ten cents and is actually more valuable than Facebook.   Despite the irony of being named after one of the ...

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London buses on routes through affluent areas fuelled by artisan coffee
21st November 2017

London buses on routes through affluent areas fuelled by artisan coffee

  London buses that pass through affluent areas of the city will be powered by artisan coffee blends according to a statement released by the Mayor’s office this week.   Waste artisan ...

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Tesla accused of stealing truck / sports car combo idea from Knight Rider
20th November 2017

Tesla accused of stealing truck / sports car combo idea from Knight Rider

  Tesla has been accused of stealing its new truck / sports car combo idea from the 1980s television show Knight Rider.   The electric car maker unveiled its first electric articulated ...

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Japanese train company apologises for early departure caused by leaves on branches
17th November 2017

Japanese train company apologises for early departure caused by leaves on branches

  A Japanese rail company apologised after one of its trains left 20 seconds early due to the large number of leaves that are still on the branches of nearby trees.   Management of the ...

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The world’s largest passenger aircraft will be turned into an airport
16th November 2017

The world’s largest passenger aircraft will be turned into an airport

  An Airbus A380 Superjumbo has been retired from service but due to its sheer size will be repurposed and used as a French airport instead.   Singapore Airlines returned the plane to ...

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Greggs life-sized advent calendar prevents the opening of multiple doors at once
15th November 2017

Greggs life-sized advent calendar prevents the opening of multiple doors at once

  Greggs have announced the launch of a new life-sized advent calendar that is designed for people who can’t resist opening multiple doors at once.   The calendar will include an array ...

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