Spoof business news

The latest roundup of what never happened in the world of business...

Poundland Naughty Elf to appear in its first pornographic movie
9th February 2018

Poundland Naughty Elf to appear in its first pornographic movie

  The Poundland naughty elf is due to appear in its first pornographic movie The W1nners’ Club can reveal.   The star of the discount retailer’s recent “Elf Behaving Badly” ...

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Samsung heir Lee Jae-yong now a gang member after time spent in prison
8th February 2018

Samsung heir Lee Jae-yong now a gang member after time spent in prison

  Samsung heir Lee Jae-yong is thought to have been ‘jumped in’ to a prison gang over the course of his recent jail term.   The Samsung Electronics vice chairman, who is known as T-Boz ...

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Elon Musk gets a speeding fine after his Tesla is clocked doing 11km/second in space
7th February 2018

Elon Musk gets a speeding fine after his Tesla is clocked doing 11km/second in space

  Elon Musk was handed a speeding ticket when his cherry red Tesla roadster was clocked doing 11km/second just outside Earth’s lower orbit.   The tech entrepreneur has apparently ...

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UPS Boeing 747 order raises concerns about parking in residential areas
6th February 2018

UPS Boeing 747 order raises concerns about parking in residential areas

  A recovery in international trade is reviving demand for the Boeing 747 as a freight aircraft, but concerns have been raised by UPS customers about parking them in residential areas. ...

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Bitcoin expected to hold its value against the North Korean Won
5th February 2018

Bitcoin expected to hold its value against the North Korean Won

  The Bitcoin cryptocurrency is set for its worst week since April 2013 but analysts remain confident that it will still hold its value against the North Korean Won.   The price has ...

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Sainsbury’s earns 60 million Nectar points after buying Nectar card
2nd February 2018

Sainsbury’s earns 60 million Nectar points after buying Nectar card

  Sainsbury’s has spent £60 million purchasing the Nectar loyalty card business in a move that could see the retailer earn as much as 60 million Nectar card points that it will be able to ...

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Australia aims to become a top international arms exporter by selling boomerangs
1st February 2018

Australia aims to become a top international arms exporter by selling boomerangs

  Australia aims to become a top international arms exporter by selling more boomerangs under a controversial Turnbull government plan.   Aussie PM, Malcolm Turnbull, has unveiled a ...

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Diesel emission test monkeys prefer VW Beetle exhaust fumes
31st January 2018

Diesel emission test monkeys prefer VW Beetle exhaust fumes

  Diesel emission tests conducted by Volkswagen have revealed that 9 out of 10 monkeys prefer the ‘high’ that is obtained from the exhaust fumes of a VW Beetle.   The exhaust fume tests ...

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Thomas Cook customers demand to reserve their sunbeds before choosing a holiday
30th January 2018

Thomas Cook customers demand to reserve their sunbeds before choosing a holiday

  Thomas Cook customers have demanded to be offered the chance to reserve their sunbeds before they have even booked a holiday destination.   Thomas Cook’s new trial scheme will ...

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Celebrities may not actually be famous after fake followers found on Twitter
29th January 2018

Celebrities may not actually be famous after fake followers found on Twitter

  A whole host of supposedly famous celebrities may not actually be famous after a number of public figures have admitted buying fake followers on Twitter.   New York’s chief ...

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