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Wind up camper van

The new VW camper van – ideal for festivals and children’s playrooms

 

Volkswagen has unveiled the prototype for its new non-petrol version of the classic camper van, but some enthusiasts have said that it could be a wind up.

 

The non-petrol revamp of the Microbus, which is known as the Bulli in Germany is an attempt by Volkswagen to boost its credentials as the auto industry moves away from vehicles with combustion engines – oh, and, er, some small matter related to not telling the truth about diesel emissions as well apparently.

Full time Estate Agent and occasional festival-goer Mr. Mike Robus said, “As a VW customer over many years, I’m used to being wound up by Volkswagen about the performance data of their vehicles, but this time around I fear their new camper van could be the biggest wind up of all. I mean – it even has a key sticking out of the chassis for fuck’s sake!”

The non-petrol VW camper is rumoured to have an acceleration rate of 0-60 mph in less than 4 seconds if it gets thrown out of the top floor window of a high rise housing block on a clear day with very little crosswind, and whilst the van’s engine is said to be the most environmentally friendly piece of engineering that Volkswagen has ever produced, it has been criticised by some motoring experts for only being able to travel for roughly 30 centimetres before it requires rewinding.

Tesla, headed by Elon Musk, has shaken up the auto industry with its ambition to build a mass market for cars that no longer require combustion engines, but commentators remain sceptical as to whether wind-up technology provides a viable alternative given the fact that at a top speed of 50cm per minute, a journey from London to Liverpool would take roughly 14 months if you manage to avoid rush hour traffic.

“I have to say I’m not convinced about this new non-petrol version of the VW camper van. The fact that the doors, the windscreen and headlights are all painted on tells me that it could all be a bit of a wind up,” Mr. Robus added.

 

 

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