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Vladimir Putin - The W1nners' club

Vladimir Putin – apparently uses the password, ‘Donald2016$$’ on his LinkedIn account


LinkedIn is no longer available in Russia after Vladimir Putin had his account suspended for being in breach of the website’s terms and conditions.


The Russian President had reportedly spent a whole afternoon choosing the right photo for his profile picture and eventually settled on one of him wearing Speedos whilst riding a Tyrannosaurus Rex and balancing an Exocet missile on his little finger.

Nearly 6 million Russians use the international business and networking site and it is thought that Mr. Putin signed up to complement his annexation policy in the Crimean Peninsula by applying for the position of Govenor of the region.

Russia’s head of Roskomnadzor – the federal agency that oversees the supervision of Telecoms, Information Technologies and Mass Communications, Mr. Remeberto Logov said, “LinkedIn must be made aware that there will be serious repercussions for taking such actions. President Putin has enough on his plate trying to extend the war in Syria without having to spend a significant amount of his valuable time choosing a profile picture that is fitting of his international status. We have therefore regrettably been forced to act in accordance with the law and block access to the website until the President is able to upload his CV.”

LinkedIn first flagged up problems with Mr. Putin’s account when it was made aware that he himself had posted the job he was actually applying for and a spokesperson for the site said, “We have very strict rules about compliancy when it comes to advertising jobs. Listing a position that you yourself are applying for is a breach of our terms and conditions – not to mention a bit bonkers regardless of whether you are undertaking an expansionist policy of regional aggression that seeks to undermine the sovereignty of neighbouring states or not.”

Mr. Putin’s account will remain suspended until he sends an email to LinkedIn verifying the Tyrannosaurus Rex in his profile picture is real. The Speedos and Exocet missiles are however acceptable to the California based website because everybody seems him brandishing those all the time.

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