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Ukip – Mtembu the Lion will receive travel expenses to and from Bongo Bongo Land as part of his contract…

 

Ukip’s attempt to rebrand itself for the post-Brexit era has experienced a setback after its new logo was alleged by certain party members to hail from Bongo Bongo land.

 

The party decided to ditch the pound as its logo and has instead opted to use the king of the jungle as its symbol of English cultural nationalism to carry it forward into the post-brexit political era.

Ukip’s Head of Convenient Cultural Misappropriation Mr. Cliff Edge said, “I can assure our members that Mtembu the lion most definitely isn’t from Bongo Bongo land. We’ve had the pound as our logo for many years now and to be honest with you, it’s become a bit of a millstone around our necks because people associate keeping the pound with having close cultural ties with other nations. At least by using a lion as our symbol, people will know that we’re a party whose values are centred around ensuring that migration is kept under control and our cultural homogeneity remains intact.”

Mtembu the lion was elected to be the party’s new logo after beating the other main front runners: Adebowale the Zebra and Ogechukwukama the African Elephant in a hotly contested vote that took place at the party’s conference in Torquay this week.

New Ukip party leader Henry Bolton ran his own leadership campaign on a vehement pro-Mtembu ticket and this is rumoured to have given him the edge in the vote against his main rival Anne Marie Waters, who was outspoken in her support for Abdul the Pakistani Mountain Goat to become the party’s new mascot.

“Mtembu the Lion can’t be from Bong Bongo Land because the lion is worn by the England team on their football shirts. The media always tries to smear people in our party with vicious rumours about coming from other countries. They even tried it with Nigel Farage once and he’s as English as Kaiser Wilhelm of Germany,” Mr. Edge added.

 

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