Theresa May has finally outlined her plans for Britain’s departure from the EU and has stated unequivocally that the word, ‘Brexit,’ will be replaced by, ‘Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.’
The Prime minister says that the word used in the hit film, ‘Mary Poppins,’ is the most accurate indicator of the terms Britain will be seeking in any negotiations with future European trading partners.
The UK’s Chief Brexit negotiator Mrs. Polly Tishun said, “Mrs. May has given clarity and direction to Britain’s negotiating position with Europe by using a word that people use when they don’t have a clue what they really want to say – as an alternative to the rather misleading, ‘Brexit.’ Brexit only ever meant Brexit so this will give all parties involved a clear roadmap for our eventual withdrawal from Europe.”
In a bid to silence critics who have dubbed her, ‘Theresa Maybe,’ The Prime Minister hopes to be referred to as, ‘Bert The Chimneysweep,’ going forward by providing answers to 12 key points that will determine the nature of Britain’s exit from the EU.
The 12 points are as follows:
- Certainty about the process of leaving the EU: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- Control of our own laws: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- Strengthen the Union between the four nations of the United Kingdom: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- Maintain the Common Travel Area with Ireland: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- Control of immigration coming from the EU: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- Rights for EU nationals in Britain, and British nationals in the EU: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- Protect workers’ rights: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- Free trade with European markets through a free trade agreement: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- New trade agreements with other countries: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- The best place for science and innovation: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- Cooperation in the fight against crime and terrorism: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious
- A smooth, orderly Brexit: Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious (although it has been stated that point 12 will depend on whether the negotiating parties fully understand their responsibilities with regard to Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious).
Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson hailed Mrs May’s announcement as a, “fantastic development that will help the UK avoid being stuck forever in some kind of permanent political purgatory,” and The Prime minister in turn responded by saying of Mr. Johnson, “He travelled all around the world and everywhere he went, he’d use his word and all would say, ‘there goes a clever gent.’”
Jeremy Corbyn has responded to the government’s announcement by stating that Mrs. May’s tactics are the wrong way around, which would mean that a Labour administration would in theory use the word, ‘suoicodilaipxecitsiligarfilacrepus.’