Chopper

Ford over-the-air software upgrade is still being beta tested

 

Ford’s first ever attempt at conducting an over-the-air software upgrade hasn’t quite gone according to plan.

 

The company’s maiden foray into the growing arena of “over-the-air” software updates has allegedly resulted in the creation of a Raleigh Chopper as a result of a suspected bug in the system.

Ford’s Head of Wi-Fi Connectivity Mr. Virgil Point-Name said, “Our first attempt at upgrading the systems in our vehicles via wi-fi has unfortunately ended up turning a £120,000 Ford GT into what appears to be a Raleigh Chopper.  Whilst this is not what we intended, the upgrade has delivered significant improvements in performance to the seating, the power steering controls and of course the gearbox – at least you would think so if you were a schoolkid back in the 1970s. Admittedly we would have preferred it if both wheels ended up the same size but hey, you can’t have everything in life can you?”

Ford’s first use of OTAs comes about two months after it said it would hire 400 engineers to work on vehicle connectivity, but it is rumoured only 100 remain after most of the team got fired when the results of the first test were revealed.

Some motoring experts have refuted Ford’s claim that the upgraded engine system delivers greater fuel efficiency due to the fact that a set of pedals and a chain does not constitute an internal combustion engine in the traditional sense – or indeed any sense if you’re not discussing the issue with a mad person.

“It’s difficult to ascertain exactly what went wrong but our customers can rest assured the problem will be ironed out promptly. All we ask is that if you own a Ford Mustang and happen to be driving around in an area with poor internet connectivity, you might want to delay adding any upgrades until you get a decent 4G connection or you might find yourself sitting on a Raleigh Grifter with a bit of cardboard wedged between the spokes to make it sound like you’re riding a motorbike,” Mr. Point-Name added.

 

 

 

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