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chernobyl - The W1nners' Club

Bitcoin mining – miners have to wear radioactive protection suits due to the large amounts of energy used….


A single bitcoin has the same carbon footprint as the Chernobyl nuclear power facility at the precise moment it exploded recent studies have revealed.


In November, the power consumed by the entire bitcoin network was estimated to be higher than that of the Republic of Ireland, but after careful analysis of the original scientific document, it was found that use of the word ‘bitcoin’ referred to a single unit rather than the entire network as one would have initially hoped.

Part-time bitcoin miner and serial non-payer of utility bills Mrs. Ellie C. Tricity said, “It’s true that bitcoin mining does require a fair bit of energy if you’re going to do it properly. In the early days of bitcoin mining, a single coin could be generated using the equivalent power of the thrust generated by the Saturn V space rocket for its entire journey into space, but modern demands require something with a little bit more oooomph! than that.”

The first ever bitcoin was generated using 12 Rolls Royce Trent engines working in series, but the system needed time to warm up when they were first switched on – surprising given the fact that only four of the above would easily generate enough thrust to launch a jumbo jet vertically.

A greener power source that has been considered for use in bitcoin mining is the epicentre of an earthquake that measures at least 9.0 on the Richter scale, but whatever is gained by using this method in terms of climate change would be significantly undermined by seismic topographical shifts and the almost total destruction of all buildings within a radius of 200 miles.

“If bitcoin continues to grow at its present rate, the only sustainable and natural power source large enough to power the mining machines that generate the coins would be an asteroid the same size as the one that wiped out the dinosaurs colliding with the Earth once again. Whist this would generate a lot of natural power, there are still issues surrounding the effect that such an energy source would ultimately have on the environment,” Mrs. Tricity added.


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