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Audi Girl - The W1nners' Club

Audi – keen to make a clear distinction between women and used cars


Audi has stated unequivocally that it does not think women are like used cars because it says they don’t get any cheaper with age.


The auto manufacturer has been criticised for an advert in China that compares buying a car to finding a wife and shows a woman having her nose, ears and teeth being inspected by her mother-in-law on her wedding day.

Audi’s Head of Birds, Tits and Wet T-Shirt Competitions Mr. Sid De Sexist said, “We completely reject any suggestion that women are like used cars because that would be outrageously offensive………to cars of course. For starters, if you decide to buy a used car, the chances are you might get to drive it around a bit before making a purchase to see if it rides properly! Eh! Eh! Know what I mean? Nudge-nudge-wink-wink! Oi! Oi!”

An Audi spokesman released a statement saying that the automaker is looking into the commercial and would provide an appropriate response as soon as his secretary finishes darning the socks that he wants to wear at the Sales conference next week.

Some are calling for a boycott of the German carmaker who are recognised as being one of the big three in China, along with Mercedes Benz and BMW, but Audi dismissed this as over-emotional and says that you always get a bit of shouting and screaming at a certain time of the month with some customers.

“We would never compare a woman to a used car because when you buy a used car, you normally get a list of all the previous owners so you know exactly where it’s been and what work it’s had done to it. Know what I mean? Eh! Eh! I’ve had my Mrs. for so long now that I have to walk in front of her holding a red flag every time we go out in public. Ka-boom-tisch! Know what I mean? Eh! Eh!” Mr. De Sexist added.


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