Appraisal form – Prison inmate Job Review

Appraisal form – Prison inmate Job Review

Inmate’s name: Antonio Cortes Job title: Building Maintainance Operative Department: Building Services – HMP Bellfield Date of engagement: 20/07/2017 Manager: Dave Smith Date of meeting: 20/10/2017 Current performance Objective/competence 1:   Knowing how to use a soldering iron. Objective/competence 2: Using equipment without supervision. Objective/competence 3: Completing a given task without attempting to escape from…

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W1nners’ Club Problem Page – I keep on getting fired!

W1nners’ Club Problem Page – I keep on getting fired!

  Dear Darcus, I keep getting fired from every new job I get. I’ve been Managing Director of a company, I then got a job as a senior director. From there I managed to secure employment as a team leader and from that point I was lucky enough to secure a cushy little number as…

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A history of how it became possible to play Candy Crush on the daily commute: Part 2

A history of how it became possible to play Candy Crush on the daily commute: Part 2

Hey – thanks for coming back! The fact that you’re reading part two of our history of how it became possible to play Candy Crush on the daily commute would suggest that you either (a) enjoyed the first part, or more likely (b) haven’t yet learned how to count properly. Whatever your reason for paying…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not start your own space tourism company?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not start your own space tourism company?

You can’t just sit around all day moaning about your old boss and how you were stitched up by your colleagues. You knew that fiddling your expenses was a sackable offence so now you’ll have to pay the consequences unfortunately. Your time will therefore need to be spent looking for work that doesn’t involve handling…

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The 6 types of coworker that you usually find in the average office

The 6 types of coworker that you usually find in the average office

Let’s be honest, working in an office is no mean feat is it? There are often very contrasting personality types that are thrown together in the vain hope that everybody will be mature enough to get the job done every day. Unfortunately however, it rarely ever works out like this. People squabble and plot against…

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Accident Report Book – Road Construction Worker

Accident Report Book – Road Construction Worker

1.    About the person who had the accident: Name: Bill Jones Address: 23 Sycamore Lane, Barnsley, South Yorkshire Postcode: S71 2JH Occupation: Road Construction Operative 2.    About you the person filling in this record: Complete if you did not have the accident: Name: Dave Smith Address: 67 Stocks Street, Barnsley, South Yorkshire Postcode: S75 6YJ…

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W1nners Club Problem Page – My colleagues think i’m tight fisted

W1nners Club Problem Page – My colleagues think i’m tight fisted

  Dear Darcus, My colleagues at work think I’m tight fisted. They may have a point in that I refuse to buy umbrellas to protect me from the rain and instead I use a 5p carrier bag to protect my head from the bad weather (it’s the same carrier bag I use for shopping B.T.W.)…

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A history of how it became possible to play Candy Crush on the daily commute: Part 1

A history of how it became possible to play Candy Crush on the daily commute: Part 1

Video games weren’t always the hi-tech, super-immersive entertainment form they are today. Back when The W1nners’ Club was nothing more than a twinkle in its father’s eye, people had to connect bulky wooden games consoles to their black and white television sets just to be able to indulge in any form of interactive entertainment. As…

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You’ve just been sacked…………why not set up your own record label?

You’ve just been sacked…………why not set up your own record label?

Here’s how to say ‘unemployment’ in some of the most random languages we can think of: Gortsazrkut’yun = Armenian Bēkāri = Bangla Nezaměstnanost = Czech Werkloosheid = Dutch Senlaboreco = Esperanto Bērōjagārī = Nepali Kubasa = Shona Arbetslöshet = Swedish Ho hloka mosebetsi = Sesotho Diweithdra = Welsh Ukungasebenzi = Zulu Now that we’ve got…

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The 5 best places to have sex in the office

The 5 best places to have sex in the office

A sultry smile over the photocopier, flushed cheeks by the watercooler, eruptive laughter at your terrible jokes – you may have all the elements in place for a workplace romance. Whilst this would never happen to anybody that works here at The W1nners’ Club, we have nevertheless put together a list of places in the…

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