W1nners’ Club Problem Page – Hiring Illegal Immigrants

W1nners’ Club Problem Page – Hiring Illegal Immigrants

    Dear Darcus, As you well know the economy has been struggling of late and what with Brexit and the ever tumbling value of the pound, running a business can be a bit like painting the Forth Bridge these days in terms of achieving your targets. As a result, I have started to recruit…

Features, Problem Page ,

Workplace chaos caused by pretending your colleague’s herbal tea is actually yours

Workplace chaos caused by pretending your colleague’s herbal tea is actually yours

  Me and my boss have a great relationship. Lots of banter, elaborate practical jokes – it all makes the working environment a much better place – between us that is. I’m the only one that has that kind of back-and-forth with him and with all my colleagues (much older Polish men who generally don’t…

Features, Office Life

You’ve just been sacked………why not become a safe cracker?

You’ve just been sacked………why not become a safe cracker?

  “…………and anyway, you can’t fire me because I QUIT!” Remember those words? Despite it being over 6 months and 12 interviews ago, you remember the day you left your last job as if it were yesterday. Whilst on the subject of yesterday, you’re still recovering from the hangover you now have after spending all…

Features, Unemployed ,

5 things on your CV that will make employers think you’re a total moron

5 things on your CV that will make employers think you’re a total moron

  Selling yourself on your CV is essential, but it’s important to sell yourself in such a way that you don’t come across as an absolute idiot to prospective employers.   That’s right. We said it. Despite the gasps of admonishment, we think it’s part of the service to let you know why you haven’t…

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Proposed disciplinary action – Electronic Road Sign Controller

Proposed disciplinary action – Electronic Road Sign Controller

  Date 17/03/2017   Dear Paul, I am writing to tell you that The Highways Agency is considering dismissing or taking disciplinary action against you. This action is being considered with regard to the following circumstances: This morning you reset the text on the road sign nearest to junction 25 of the M62 to contain…

Features, Human Resources , ,

W1nners’ Club Problem Page – Dating a Colleague

W1nners’ Club Problem Page – Dating a Colleague

  Dear Darcus, I am the sales manager of a car dealership. I am married with three kids but I have recently started having an affair with one of the Vauxhall Astras in the showroom. I think my condition is known as mechaphilia but I can honestly say that we are truly happy and are…

Features, Problem Page , ,

9 Awesome food hacks using everyday items you’ll find in the office

9 Awesome food hacks using everyday items you’ll find in the office

  Offices have a reputation for being sterile places where nothing interesting occurs unless everybody is drunk at the Christmas party. We intend to change all that however. If you use a little imagination and look around you, you’ll notice that your place of work contains everything you’d ever need to set up your own…

Features, Office Life ,

You’ve just been sacked………why not join the SAS?

You’ve just been sacked………why not join the SAS?

  Does the code phrase, ‘p45,’ mean anything to you? We thought it might. As a result of what you considered to be a minor transgression and what your employee handbook clearly states is gross misconduct, you have now joined the ranks of the unemployed. You’ll need to consider your next career move carefully to…

Features, Unemployed , , ,

How to get paid off enough money from your employer to go travelling

How to get paid off enough money from your employer to go travelling

  We all get to a point in our careers where the 9 to 5 just isn’t cutting it anymore. It may well be that you need to seek a new professional path but 9 times out of 10 that feeling of being jaded exists because you’re overworked, underpaid and could do with a bloody…

Employed, Features , , ,

Accident Report Book – Arborist

Accident Report Book – Arborist

  1.    About the person who had the accident: Name: James Green Address: 65 Appleby Grove, Smithfield, Derby Postcode: DE41 7AG Occupation: Head Arborist 2.    About you the person filling in this record: Complete if you did not have the accident: Name: Simon Green Address: 65 Appleby Grove, Smithfield, Derby Postcode: DE41 7AG Occupation: Assistant…

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